I held her hand and watched her give birth to Nicholas, my youngest son. We slipped away from responsibility and met in a motel room in Mississippi. We drove to the beach and watched the kids play while we held hands. We sat in the sand and stared at the stars. No one will make me feel the way she did. I could tell her anything and she would listen. She knew I had more inside me, and pushed me to prove it. She laughed at my bad jokes. And told me when I was being a dick. I love the smell of her hair and the feel of her hands when she would wrap her fingers in mine. I would wake each morning and give her a kiss. I loved her so much it hurt. We left for one day to drive to a beach half-way across the state. She said “I love you” and my heart would stop. We drove up north to meet her family. We drove further north to meet my family. Her smile can melt me, I’ll always give in. She always thought of me first, and forgave me when I didn’t put her first. We walked in the park and talked of nothing important. We sat on the boardwalk, completely in love and said nothing at all.
I have so much more I could say. But this is why her leaving is breaking my soul.